Five Things that Never Happened in "Bedside Manner"
1.
Starsky: My car?
Hutch: Don't you remember? It blew up.
Starsky: Oh... yeah. I don't like flying.
Hutch: Don't worry, we won't be buying the Black Baron's plane. You were
going to get a Volvo instead.
Starsky: A Volvo? (goes back to sleep, looking worried)
2.
Starsky: My car?
Hutch: Car? What car? You've never owned a car. We take the bus to work
every day.
Starsky: Really?
Hutch: Yeah, but it's a pretty red bus with a white stripe.
Starsky: S'what I thought. (goes back to sleep, smiling)
3.
Starsky: My car?
Hutch: She ran off with a handsome yellow Camaro.
Starsky: My car ran away?
Hutch: You can't cage the ones you love, Starsky. You have to let them be
free.
Starsky: I don' think I like that Camaro... (goes back to sleep, frowning)
4.
Starsky: My car?
Hutch: You know what? She's fine. She's perfect. In fact, she's better
than perfect! She had babies.
Starsky: My car had babies?
Hutch: Yep, baby Torinos. Five of them. I'm raising them in my
greenhouse.
Starsky: Thass nice. (goes back to sleep, smiling)
5.
Starsky: My car?
Hutch: Didn't you see her? She was just here a minute ago.
Starsky: She was?
Hutch: Yeah, but they only let one visitor in at a time. So, she's waiting
out in the hall.
Starsky: Okay. (stares at the door, wide awake)
Hutch: Um, Starsk? I-I was kidding.
Starsky: (continues to stare at the door)
Hutch: I'm going to hell for this, aren't I?
~end~
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